Does Domestic Violence Only Occur Between Partners?

JoAnn Mullinix, M.A., LMFTA

Discussions about domestic violence are generally regarding partnered relationships. However; domestic violence may also be perpetrated in the home between other family members. The Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention shared that “according to the 2004 NIBRS data, juveniles were 17% of all assault offenders reported to law enforcement, and 9% of domestic assault offenders.” In half of the cases, parents were the victim. The most frequently used weapon was a knife, and mothers were the most likely to be victimized. Parenting is a lifelong journey. A parent whose child is abusing them may feel stuck; after all you can’t just break up with your child. Setting boundaries with children is so important and establishing consequences for boundary violations is equally necessary.

How to Establish Boundaries?

1. Examine your values and those you expect your family to support (think about expectations around language, physical contact, personal space, and communication)

2. What should your child expect if boundaries are broken (age appropriate and consistent)

3. Have a family meeting and share expectations and consequences

4. If you are unable to hold your boundary, what is your plan? (five minute cool down, call a support person, seek help from clergy or therapist)

5. Model the boundaries you set and make time to check in with your child. Undivided attention helps build healthy communication.